malnosso | [Voice]

[This voice may sound very, very familiar to some residents.]

Oh goodness!

My my, so! I imagine all of you are wondering what's going on here! I know, we don't contact you very much, but gracious me this should change! Yes. Yes, the best working relationships rely on communication and such and lovely things like that. So I shall be communicating with you, and some day we'll have some semblance of a professional acquaintance.

Possibly.

Oh, but of course the Great One has spoken to you concerning our offer! I heard that he would from the previous management, yes, and the Great One is nothing if not thorough! Naturally, I imagine he informed you of the circumstances of the agreement, but for those of you unfortunate enough to miss an audience with him, I shall summarize!

You will be contracted to fight in various skirmishes to which we will transport you in exchange for more modern accommodations within your enclosure (electricity/energy, appliances, central lighting and heat) and perhaps an end to the experimentation, if all goes well. Naturally, when you are out we will provide you with world-class accommodations! Anything your heart could desire for your quarters- well, within reason. We're not miracle workers after all! [Have a joyful laugh!]

Likewise, if you require special tools or vehicles for battle, we will do our best to provide those as well. You need only ask!

So, I ask of you, are you interested? It would be wonderful if we could put an end to all this!

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

I'm upholding my end of the bargain, naturally!

I must tell you sir, it's such an honor to speak with you again.

...They cannot seriously be placing you in charge of the organization.

Hahahaha!

Are you impressed?! [He asks this with the air of a small boy asking his father if that was a good throw.]

I am appalled by their dwindling wisdom.

Goodness, I know! I know. I've such work to do that I must get started right away. First and foremost, of course, we must begin to show you your proper due-

Gracious there are employees that view you as some kind of traitor or demon! That will not do, will not. I'll commission and release an educational pamphlet proclaiming your virtues and accomplishments right away, yes I shall.

Try to change too much and you'll have a mutiny on your hands.

[Though considering the alternative that might be for the best.]

Nonsense! I make mutinies, I don't cause them! Ho ho!

Ever the comedian.

Just how did you come into power?

Come have tea with me and I'll tell you! [Bouncy! Tea with the Great One!]

I'll have to decline. Lengthy stories of the success of others put me to sleep, and I have work to do.

Oh. [He sounds CRUSHED, really. But then he perks right back up.] Well, I suppose that's to be expected! Such genius isn't in ready supply, after all. Ah ha ha, since we'll be working together from now on, I'll have plenty of opportunities to speak with you!

Just what do you assume we'll be working on together?

Why...why everything! I want to give you my support!

...Interesting. Do go on.

[OMG HE WANTS TO TALK OMG OMG]

Of-of course!

I-oh, I do hope you aren't too cross, but I've just been informed of your-your miraculous research! You can revive those sacrificed?! Truly?!

So the little mice have been talking.

Oh goodness- Oh my goodness-! This is wonderful news, simply wonderful!

Oh- yes yes, before I forget! I have but a teensy favor to ask of you, Great One!

What do you want now?

Actually, it's a bit more physical, ha ha! Could you perhaps scoot your barrier just a tiny bit back? I need one of those rooms to transport our potential troops!

Work, work, work...

Disc H.47 will be yours tomorrow morning.

Ohh, thank you!

Ah- one last thing! May I ask who it was you pieced together?

No one of any importance. I hardly even remember the name.

Was it a woman?

An informative one, maybe?

You've been mislead.

Oh gracious! How rude.

Well, then, I shall cast it out of my mind. Thank you, Great One! Just send a list of your required supplies my way and I'll have them sent to you post haste!

[Voice / Unhackable]

malnosso - 2010-03-11 08:42 (UTC) - Expand